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The 3rd Birthday
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The 3rd Birthday
The 3rd Birthday
Aya Brea
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[1]
Console Genre Developers
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Nov 9, 2018, 8:41 PM
Since I played it a few days ago to see what the big hate was about.
You can also safely assume most of that rant is there more for the humor of doing an entire game review in a single comment.
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Nov 7, 2018, 2:34 PM
Bravo, man, how long have you kept all that bottled up? xD
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Nov 7, 2018, 7:03 AM
what
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Nov 7, 2018, 3:58 AM
Body shaming has extremely little to do with the problems this game had. The story is terrible, confusing, practically meaningless, full of massive plotholes and contradictions, and remains completely opaque well beyond the ending, even if you're paying attention. At no point does the game actually explain how 90% of its mechanics work. The plot ruins some characters by portraying them completely counter to who they were previously. The enemies belong in kingdom hearts rather than Parasite Eve. The human antagonists are far more Final Fantasy than Parsite Eve. Amnesia plot. New York has been remodeled such that no real world places need exist in it. The guns have been replaced by generic random alphanumeric strings where once they had some basis in reality, helping to ground the series in a relatable world, to better sell the horror of the weird. Time travel as a core plot element but also something that's completely glossed over as a normal thing. Conversations that exposit the plot, but require you to intentionally not progress with the mission because taking a single step advances to the next room and forces you to miss the entire conversation. Enemies are completely invulnerable for several seconds during spawning, but will still usurp your autotargetting making you waste ammo on immortal not-yet-entities. Lack of all abilities ever shown by any character involved in any previous title. Characters who die are usually seen in the immediately following scene. Bait and switch character mechanics. Enemies that can be at 0 health but won't die unless you do the special attack, but only in this scene, not any of the others. A tutorial section that doesn't actually explain anything or ensure that you've learned to use any of the things. Unkillable enemies that can teleport and will insta-kill you if they're too close, and you're locked into the room with no space to dodge and have to wait several minutes before you are allowed to escape. An entire chase sequence where this is the case and you will get stuck many times. Two sections where you have to destroy walls with grenades, even though the game never explains this and every other barrier in the game requires you to either kill a load bearing enemy or jump into a different character to get past them. This also happens during an instakill invulnerable unslowable teleporting enemy chase scene. Grenades take a long time to throw and hurt you if you're too close. You do not have the time or space to do this with teleporting deathgod chasing you. Getting hit cancels your grenade throwing animation. Enemies are invulnerable even if you have a perfect shot, unless you're inside their arena space. Toxic gas that can't be avoided in spite of the fact that you are explicitly told to avoid it. Sniping segment with infinitely spawning flying ranged enemies during this same toxic gas arena. Mission directives amount to effectively "follow the green arrow because no one explains what anything is or why you're doing it". Characters do not get introductions until after untimely death and subsequent emotional breakdown scene, causing you to completely not care about them.
Admittedly the fetish outfits are a fault though.
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Sep 3, 2016, 2:17 PM
These terrible outfits and her twig like body are a fe of the reasons this game sucked.
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